Because I now have White Rose permanently stuck in my head – and it’s not really at all soothing, unlike some parts of the Bellini – last night, in an effort to avoid what happened last week, I decided to listen to I puritani as I was falling asleep.
Not a recording of me singing, of course. That would be weird, and I don’t have a recording of me singing it anyway. Just to the recording I listened to a million times while I was learning the role.
And I realized why I enjoyed singing it so much: I am completely, totally addicted to strong and extreme emotions.
Not so much in real life, because strong emotions usually come along with real risks and conflicts (and I don’t much like either of those things), but with the kind you get on stage when you’re acting an extreme character. Listening to I Puritani again I only got flashes of them here and there, much weaker than when I was right in the role, but still…Now I know why I felt so utterly drained after the show was over. I was in withdrawal.
Fortunately Sophie Scholl is also very emotional and suffers throughout the show, so I’m back on it. I don’t know what I’ll do after this show is over, though.
By the way, I bitched about the bad review on Facebook for a while and am now over it.